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Cover of Bite Me

Bite Me

A Love Story

Christopher Moore

A manic, laugh-out-loud urban fantasy romp where goth teens, vampires, and a giant shaved cat collide in a delightfully absurd San Francisco.

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What it feels like

Reading this book feels like being strapped into a neon-lit, goth-themed rollercoaster that is slightly off its tracks. It is a relentlessly brisk, laugh-out-loud experience driven by a manic, snarky energy and a cast of deeply weird, deeply lovable misfits. The prose is hyperactive and drenched in early-2000s teen slang, capturing the chaotic diary entries of a wannabe vampire alongside the slapstick absurdity of a monster hunt in San Francisco. Beneath the crude humor, comic violence, and giant shaved vampire cats, there is a surprisingly sweet core about found family and unconventional romance. It will absolutely delight readers who prefer their urban fantasy to be irreverent, campy, and unapologetically bizarre.

Mood
  • manic
  • campy
  • zany
Tone
  • irreverent
  • snarky
  • absurd
  • chaotic
Pace
brisk
Themes
found family · unconventional romance · embracing weirdness · urban absurdity
The writing
Hyperactive, slang-heavy, and relentlessly witty, filled with pop-culture riffs and teenage diary-style snark.
The arc
Starts in chaotic teenage angst and escalates into a hilarious, high-stakes romp of bizarre camaraderie.
Who it's for
Readers who love their urban fantasy served with a massive dose of slapstick comedy, goth-kid satire, and unapologetic weirdness.
Content notes
  • comic violence
  • crude humor
  • sexual references
  • profanity

About the book

The city of San Francisco is being stalked by a huge shaved vampyre cat named Chet, and only I, Abby Normal, emergency backup mistress of the Greater Bay Area night, and my manga-haired love monkey, Foo Dog, stand between the ravenous monster and a bloody massacre of the general public.Whoa. And this is a love story? Yup. 'Cept there's no whining. See, while some lovers were born to run, Jody and Tommy were born to bite. Well, reborn, that is, now that they're vampires. Good thing theirs is an undying love, since their Goth Girl Friday, Abby Normal, imprisoned them in a bronze statue.Abby wants to be a bloodsucking fiend, too, but right now she's really busy with other stuff, like breaking in a pair of red vinyl thigh-high Skankenstein® platform boots and wrangling her Ph.D.-candidate boyfriend, Steve (the love monkey). And then there's that vampire cat Chet, who's getting bigger and smarter—and thirstier—by the minute. Abby thought she and Steve could handle the kitty cat on their own, mais non...Before you can say "OMG! WTF?" Tommy and Jody are sprung from captivity, and join forces with Abby, Steve, the frozen-turkey-bowling Safeway crew, the Emperor of San Francisco and his trusty dogs Lazarus and Bummer, Abby's gay Goth friend Jared, and SF's finest Cavuto and Rivera to hunt big cat and save the city. And that's when the fun really begins.

Description from Open Library.

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