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How Not to Write a Novel
200 Classic Mistakes and How to Avoid Them—A Misstep-by-Misstep Guide
304 pages
A hilarious, tough-love masterclass in self-editing that teaches you how to write well by showing you exactly how to write terribly.
What it feels like
Reading this book feels like sitting at a bar with two cynical but deeply affectionate editors who are gleefully roasting the slush pile for your benefit. The pace is incredibly brisk, broken down into two hundred bite-sized, easily digestible mistakes that make it perfect for dipping in and out of when you need a quick reality check. The mood is relentlessly lighthearted and energetic, driven by a snarky, irreverent tone that never takes itself too seriously. What makes the experience so memorable is the prose itself; the authors craft deliberately atrocious, laugh-out-loud parodies of bad writing that perfectly illustrate their points. It is a delight for aspiring novelists and seasoned writers alike, offering a tough-love approach to the craft that leaves you feeling both thoroughly entertained and sharply equipped to tackle your own revisions.
- Mood
- lighthearted
- energetic
- humorous
- encouraging
- Tone
- snarky
- hilarious
- irreverent
- instructive
- witty
- Pace
- brisk
- Themes
- the craft of writing · creative pitfalls · self-editing · the absurdity of bad writing
- The writing
- Sharp and satirical, alternating between straightforward, no-nonsense advice and deliberately atrocious, laugh-out-loud parodies of bad writing.
- The arc
- Moves from the daunting realization of one's own bad habits to a sense of empowered, amused clarity about how to fix them.
- Who it's for
- Aspiring novelists and seasoned writers alike who appreciate tough love served with a heavy dose of sarcasm.
About the book
"What do you think of my fiction book writing?" the aspiring novelist extorted."Darn," the editor hectored, in turn. "I can not publish your novel! It is full of what we in the business call 'really awful writing.'""But how shall I absolve this dilemma? I have already read every tome available on how to write well and get published!" The writer tossed his head about, wildly."It might help," opined the blonde editor, helpfully, "to ponder how NOT to write a novel, so you might avoid the very thing!"Many writing books offer sound advice on how to write well. This is not one of those books. On the contrary, this is a collection of terrible, awkward, and laughably unreadable excerpts that will teach you what to avoid—at all costs—if you ever want your novel published.In How Not to Write a Novel, authors Howard Mittelmark and Sandra Newman distill their 30 years combined experience in teaching, editing, writing, and reviewing fiction to bring you real advice from the other side of the query letter. Rather than telling you how or what to write, they identify the 200 most common mistakes unconsciously made by writers and teach you to recognize, avoid, and amend them. With hilarious "mis-examples" to demonstrate each manuscript-mangling error, they'll help you troubleshoot your beginnings and endings, bad guys, love interests, style, jokes, perspective, voice, and more. As funny as it is useful, this essential how-NOT-to guide will help you get your manuscript out of the slush pile and into the bookstore.
Description from Open Library.
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