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People skills
First published 1979 · 300 pages
A practical, empathetic toolkit for untangling the messy reality of human communication.
What it feels like
Reading this book feels like sitting down with a wise, patient mentor who finally explains why your conversations keep going off the rails. The pacing is steady and deliberate, designed to be absorbed and practiced rather than rushed. Its mood is deeply grounded and hopeful, replacing the anxiety of interpersonal conflict with a calm sense of agency. The prose is straightforward and free of dense psychological jargon, favoring relatable scenarios and clear, actionable frameworks. It moves you from the frustration of feeling unheard to the quiet confidence of knowing how to listen and assert yourself. This is a must-read for anyone seeking to bridge the gap between what they mean to say and how they are actually understood.
- Mood
- reflective
- grounded
- hopeful
- calm
- Tone
- instructive
- empathetic
- pragmatic
- encouraging
- direct
- Pace
- steady
- Themes
- active listening · conflict resolution · setting boundaries · emotional intelligence · authentic connection
- The writing
- Clear, accessible, and structured, relying on relatable examples and actionable frameworks rather than academic jargon.
- The arc
- Moves from the frustration of misunderstood interactions to a grounded sense of agency and relational clarity.
- Who it's for
- Anyone tired of talking past their loved ones or colleagues who wants concrete, actionable tools for better conversations.
Content notes
- discussion of interpersonal conflict
- relationship stress
About the book
Improve your personal and professional relationships instantly with this timeless guide to communication, listening skills, body language, and conflict resolution. A wall of silent resentment shuts you off from someone you love....You listen to an argument in which neither party seems to hear the other....Your mind drifts to other matters when people talk to you....
People Skills is a communication-skills handbook that can help you eliminate these and other communication problems. Author Robert Bolton describes the twelve most common communication barriers, showing how these "roadblocks" damage relationships by increasing defensiveness, aggressiveness, or dependency. He explains how to acquire the ability to listen, assert yourself, resolve conflicts, and work out problems with others. These are skills that will help you communicate calmly, even in stressful emotionally charged situations.
People Skills will show you:
How to get your needs met using simple assertion techniques
How body language often speaks louder than words
How to use silence as a valuable communication tool
How to de-escalate family disputes, lovers' quarrels, and other heated arguments Both thought-provoking and practical, People Skills is filled with workable ideas that you can use to improve your communication in meaningful ways, every day.
Description from Open Library.
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