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Cover of She Comes First

She Comes First

Ian Kerner

264 pages

A witty, shame-free masterclass in prioritizing female pleasure and cultivating deeper, more generous intimacy.

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What it feels like

Reading this book feels like having a candid, judgment-free conversation with a highly knowledgeable and deeply empathetic friend. It moves at a brisk, engaging pace, stripping away the awkwardness and anxiety that often surround discussions of sexual intimacy. The prose is witty and conversational, relying on clever, accessible metaphors rather than dry clinical jargon to demystify female anatomy. There is a distinctly positive, empowering mood that permeates the text, shifting the focus from performative sex to genuine, mutual fulfillment. It delights partners eager to become more generous lovers and couples looking to deepen their physical connection, offering a shame-free, enthusiastic approach to pleasure that leaves readers feeling confident, informed, and inspired to communicate more openly.

Mood
  • intimate
  • positive
  • empowering
  • open-minded
Tone
  • frank
  • encouraging
  • humorous
  • empathetic
  • educational
Pace
brisk
Themes
prioritizing female pleasure · sexual communication · mutual fulfillment · dismantling bedroom myths · intimate connection
The writing
Conversational and witty, using clever metaphors to make clinical anatomy highly accessible and engaging.
The arc
Shifts from addressing common sexual anxieties to building confident, joyful, and mutually satisfying intimacy.
Who it's for
Partners seeking to better understand female anatomy and couples eager to cultivate a more generous, communicative sex life.
Content notes
  • explicit sexual content
  • anatomical descriptions

About the book

As women everywhere will attest, when it comes to understanding female sexuality, most guys know more about what's under the hood of a car than under the hood of a clitoris. And while it seems that men have struggled valiantly since the dawn of time to find ways to reliably elicit the female orgasm, rare is the guy who has the modesty to ask: "What do I do?" Ironically, the answer has always been right there on the tip of his tongue.Welcome to the world of She Comes First, where the mystery of female satisfaction is solved and the tongue is proven mightier than the sword. According to Ian Kerner, clinical sexologist and evangelist of the female orgasm, oral sex has long been deemed an optional aspect of foreplay, but, in fact, it's coreplay -- simply the best way for leading a woman through the entire process of sexual response.Fun, informative, and easy to read, She Comes First is a virtual encyclopedia of female pleasure, detailing dozens of tried-and-true techniques for consistently satisfying a woman and illustrated step-by-step instructions to ensure success. These simple methods represent a new era in sexual intimacy, one in which the exchange of pleasure occurs on a level playing field and fulfillment is mutual.She Comes First exuberantly offers a fresh new sexual philosophy that inspires every man to make a mantra of Rhett Butler's infamous line to Scarlett O'Hara, "You should be kissed, and often, and by someone who knows how."

Description from Open Library.

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