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Boys & Sex
Young Men on Hookups, Love, Porn, Consent, and Navigating the New Masculinity
304 pages
An unflinching and empathetic exploration of the hidden emotional and physical realities shaping today's young men.
What it feels like
Reading this book feels like sitting down for an urgent, deeply empathetic conversation about the realities young men face today. The pace is steady and deliberate, weaving together candid interviews, academic research, and thoughtful analysis without ever feeling dry. It carries a frank, provocative tone that refuses to shy away from uncomfortable subjects, from locker room talk and pornography to the complexities of consent and sexual violence. Yet, beneath the unflinching examination of toxic masculinity and bro culture lies a profound sense of hope and a genuine desire to understand. It is a thought-provoking, paradigm-shifting experience that will resonate deeply with parents, educators, and anyone invested in helping boys navigate the fraught landscape of modern intimacy and emotional connection.
- Mood
- thought-provoking
- urgent
- reflective
- unflinching
- Tone
- provocative
- earnest
- analytical
- empathetic
- frank
- Pace
- steady
- Themes
- navigating modern masculinity · the impact of hookup culture · redefining consent and intimacy · unlearning toxic stereotypes · the hidden emotional lives of boys
- The writing
- A fascinating, accessible mix of comprehensive research, expert insight, and candid personal anecdotes.
- The arc
- Moves from confronting uncomfortable cultural realities and hidden truths to a hopeful, paradigm-shifting vision for moving forward.
- Who it's for
- Parents, educators, and anyone seeking a deeper, empathetic understanding of the cultural forces shaping young men today.
Content notes
- sexual violence
- pornography
- excessive drinking
- toxic masculinity
- hookup culture
About the book
"Peggy Orenstein's Girls & Sex broke ground, shattered taboos, and galvanized conversations about young women's right to pleasure and agency in sexual encounters. It also had an unintended effect on its author: Orenstein realized that talking about girls is only half the conversation. To understand girls and sex, we also need to talk about boys and sex. Today's young men are subject to the same cultural forces as their female peers. They are steeped in the distorted media images and binary stereotypes of female sexiness and toxic masculinity which shape how they, too, navigate sexual and emotional relationships. In Boys & Sex, Orenstein uses the same fascinating mix of anecdote and research to reveal how young men understand and negotiate the new rules of physical and emotional intimacy. Drawing on comprehensive interviews with young men, psychologists, academics, and experts in the field, Orenstein takes an unprecedented look at the myriad factors that are shaping boys' ideas of sex, girls, and masculinity including: locker room talk, how the word "hilarious" robs boys of empathy, pornography as the new sex education, hookup culture and consent, bro culture and #metoo, excessive drinking and frat parties, and boys' experience as victims and perpetrators of sexual violence. By exploring the complexity of young men's attitudes, beliefs, and experiences, Orenstein unravels the hidden truths, hard lessons, and important realities of boys' sex lives today. The result is a provocative and paradigm-shifting work that offers a much-needed vision of how boys can truly move forward as better men"--
Description from Open Library.
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